My advice, take pictures!

I'm sure you are wondering what I am talking about. As I was putting together picture collages with my nieces after my dad passed, I realized there weren't many pictures of him and I past the age of 5. Perhaps it was because I didn't want to take pictures or the cost of developing was too much or perhaps he didn't want his picture taken anymore. I then thought about how many pictures of me with my kids there are and there really aren't a lot. A lot of the time I am the one behind the camera or I hate the way I look so I refuse to take a picture. However I realize now that when my kids are older they won't care what I looked like in the pictures. They will perhaps see a picture of us and remember a fun time we shared together. Remember to take pictures of your kids with their grandparents too! The day after my dad passed Nick immediately asked me for a picture of him and Papa together. Thankfully, Alexander had snapped pictures with his little camera a few months before otherwise there would not have been any individual pictures of my dad with Nick. So the next time you are together and you are the one taking pictures, ask someone to snap a picture of you and your kids. I guarantee you won't regret capturing a memory to look back on.

“What I like about photographs is that they capture a moment that’s gone forever, impossible to reproduce.” ― Karl Lagerfeld

Mom, Me, & Dad

A great quote!

So I love quotes, you can ask any of my Facebook friends, I often post them.  Sometimes a quote can sum up your feelings more than a long paragraph. So I was on on of my favorite sites just checking on quotes and came across this one. One of my favorite sites.

 “Hearing him talk about his mother, about his intact family, makes my chest hurt for a second, like someone pierced it with a needle.” 
― Veronica Roth, Divergent

This quote sums up how I feel every time someone talks about their parents. I don't want people to stop talking to me about their parents, but it brings its own special pain. It is a pain that you can not understand until you have lost a parent. Sure I can still talk about mine, but it is all about things in the past. I will no longer talk about the goofy conversation I had with my mom or complain about my dad make stupid remarks about my cooking. All I have are memories both good and bad to cherish. 

The last couple of months have been rough around here. Not only did I lose my dad, but my husband lost one of his close friends a mere 10 days after my dad. She was a wonderful young woman and I am still in disbelief she is gone. She was a young woman who to me had a larger than life personality, she had her whole life ahead of her. We always ask why in times like this, why is it the young who are so full of life and potential seem to be taken from us so soon? I think in a way these people know somehow that their time on this Earth is limited more so than most people and they know they need to live everyday as if it their last. I will never forget her awesome smile that was always present on her face and her bubbly personality. 

The ache from missing my mom is present everyday and more so these last months. I long to be able to pick up the phone and talk to her about what is happening to share my worries with her. She had a way of giving advice and support without it being pushy.

My advice if you still have parents, cherish them. Even the days they are assholes and you want to never talk to them again. Remember too that they aren't only your parents, but people with their own issues. You may think you know everything going on with them, but you never can because no matter how old you are, your parents will try to protect you from the bad things. Once they are gone, that is it and you don't want to regret never forgiving them or trying to get to know them as a person. Life is too short, so call your dad, send your mom flowers just because, but please don't waste your time with them. 

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."