Silence is not so golden.

It is amazing how quickly the constant screams  hum of children can become something you look forward to. This past week was a little rough, being Mother's Day and all. I had a couple of bouts with insomnia so there was a lot of silence. I was watching tv or on the computer or reading wile I was trying to convince my body it was time to sleep. I learned that I do not particularly enjoy complete silence. There was a time in my life where I loved it, now not so much. You see for me, the silence is a time for me to think about things. Life, Mom, the kids, and not only am I thinking, I start to belittle myself. *sigh* We are our own worse enemy. It is amazing how much we can crucify ourselves, but can try to bring others up.  am slowly trying to turn my thoughts around, but after so many years of doing it, it isn't going to be an instant solution. I just wish I saw myself the way others claim to see me as. Yes I said claim because even I doubt I am as good as they say..