Bullying is something that hits close to home for me. As a teenager I was bullied and in turn became very depressed and had a lot of anxiety. I missed more days than I can count of school because I was making myself physically ill. I dropped 25 pounds in a matter of weeks, I was a wreck. I was embarrassed about being bullied so I never told anyone what was happening. I may have mentioned it to a friend in passing, but never elaborated. Even after my mom got me to a counselor because she knew there was something bothering me, I didn't tell. I feared that if I told someone what was going on, it would make things worse. It was only two people who belittled me daily, but what if I told and their friends started in on me too? Bullying leaves scars that never fully go away. It destroys your self esteem and makes you doubt yourself. I still remember the names and faces of those kids. Hell, I even remember the teacher, class, and who I sat by.
My son has been a victim of bullying himself. He had a friend who would be very mean to him and mutter mean things under his breath at him. He would later apologize, but it would start all over. I finally explained to him that this kid was not a friend. That a true friend does not treat you bad and make you feel bad about yourself. Thankfully he was able to distance himself from that kid and seems to have helped. I worry about him though because he is a perfect target for bullies.
Last night my oldest who has been struggling with middle school informed us that she too is being bullied. I knew something was up because she was becoming a bit more withdrawn. I am so happy she had the courage to tell us instead of hiding like I did. However, she doesn't want the teachers to know for fear that they will call the kids out and it will get worse. What do you do in a situation like that? I want to fix it for her, but also want to honor her wishes. So I contacted the school's counselor to see if they could talk to her and give her some tips on dealing with it. I hope by the end of today she will have some sort of peace of mind.
Watching my own kids go through bullying, sucks me right back to that classroom with those kids tormenting me. It is taking everything on me not to unleash my mama bear and got rip those kids apart. This might be one of the toughest things I have had to deal with as a parent yet.
